screw you

August, 2009
Volume II, Issue 1



President Wins Recycling Award for 2009 Convocation Speech

Nobel-prize winner Al Gore will visit campus to present President Ransdell with the “Goldman Prize for Excellence in Protecting the Environment” for his Convocation speech inaugurating the 2009 – 2010 academic year.

“We’re very pleased that President Ransdell was able to demonstrate recycling at its best through the reuse of major parts of the same convocation speech he has given for the past ten years” intoned Vice President Al Gore.

“His ‘adaptive reuse’ of the same hackneyed, hum-drum, banal, shopworn phrases that he trots out for convocation, commencement, donor speeches, and interviews demonstrates a serious commitment to sustainability.”

Among the many recycled tropes from the 2009 speech are:

“What an exhilarating time of year this is . . . I personally consider this moment, which we take once a year, to be among the most important moments we share as a university community and a campus family.”

“I will keep pushing and driving us toward that vision of being a leading American university with international reach. I will keep pushing the envelope and measuring progress in our strategic plan.”

“Take ownership of both your destiny and of WKU’s destiny.”

“Martin Luther King did not proclaim that ‘I have a plan.’ He said, ‘I have a dream.’ Our dreams are modest compared to his. They may not change the course of humankind, but they will change the course of a university.”

Gore concluded, “He also mouthed the phrase ‘leading American university’ 10 times. Count ‘em. Ten. That takes a level of commitment to recycling that we rarely see on American campuses.”

When reached for comment Ransdell thanked Gore for being a leading university with an international reach.







Smoke up
President Ransdell Gears Up For The Listening Tour


In This Issue:

Presidential "Listening Tour" To Be Followed By . . . More >

Provost Announces Retirement . . . More>

New Dean of University Coilege . . . More>

Incoming Freshman Style Guide . . . More>

The Western™ Reacts . . . More>

The Western™ Football in Transitional Year. . . More>

Smoke up
Faculty at a 2009 "Engaging the Spirit" Session


The Big Red Tool spent summer break in President Ransdell's bedroom closet. Observing.
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