screw you

February, 2010
Volume II, Issue 5

Back Issues

 

 

News Analysis: Strategery in Action

President Ransdell has released the new The Western™ Strategery Plan. A centerpiece of the Plan is to develop a more compelling brand image for The Western™. “Leading something something with intercontinental blah blah…. It’s just plain stale,” commented an anonymous source.

New branding slogans being considered include:

  • “Making the Ignorant 'Norant' Since 1906”
  • “Forever Young”
  • “Poor Students Deserve an Impoverished University”
  • “The Schlitz of Directional Universities”
  • “Where Every Student is a Very Special Number”
  • “We Will Award No Degree Before its Time”
  • “From the Land of Pleasant Living”
  • “Challenging Student Wallets since 2001”

New names being considered for The Western™ include:

  • Harverd University
  • Chillax Off the Chain College
  • TheWestern729@BowlingGreen.KY
  • Gary Force Honda/Toyota University
  • Commonwealth University
  • El Occidental™

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

blah

No Goats Allowed!
AGR Fraternity Erects New Fence.

In This Issue:

The Western™ Denies Heath Care . . . More >

Major Changes for Herald . . . More >

Lost Freshman . . . More >

The Horoscope . . . More >

Farewell to "Wood" . . . More >

Strategery in Action . . . More >

The Olympic Dream . . . More >

 

 

The Big Red Tool doesn't think coach MacDonald will get fired. Until the end of the season.
Contact us at thewestern.bigredtool@gmail.com
. Visit our blog at http://riseoverrunmag.com.

rss

Copyright © 2008-2009 The Big Red Tool
If you wish to cancel your subscription to this newsletter, click here.