screw you

March, 2011
Volume III, Issue 5

Back Issues



Institute for Citizenship and Something Relevant Sponsors “Wisconistan Crisis Think-In”™

The Western™’s ICSR plans to sponsor a world crisis Think-In™ designed to place events in the American Midwest and North Africa in the context of social change.

Most students, however, were unable to differentiate between Wisconsin, Libya, and Egypt. “I think Egypt is the place that makes that cheese-curd oil,” stated Jim Jones, Alvaton senior. “No, you idiot,” countered Marsha Westboro, Glasgow freshman, “The Cheese Kurds are an overpressed ethnic group in Iraq whose gun rights were taken away by Saddam Hussein Obama.”

Efforts to clarify the situation using a world map were unsuccessful, as none of the students present had seen one before and ICSR facilitators refused on principle to correct any errors of fact uttered by students.  “Wow, it’s like Google Maps for my iPhone, only a lot bigger and really flat,” stated Herman Neuticles, SGA Undersecretary of Interpretive Theory. “And I can’t see the buildings or the storefronts on this thing. How will I know where to park if I go there?”

Despite not knowing anything about the topic, students argued vigorously about core problems in the region. “See, the people are tired of dictators forcing them to unify extremist teachers and firefighters,” claimed one. “No, I heard they overthrew the Egyptian Pharaoh because he was using Twitter.” “Wait, I heard it was Mubrakah Gaffykakyfaffy who was trying to collectively bargain for Tunastan. And taxes. It definitely is probably about taxes.

At the end of the meeting most students agreed that they had no idea where the hell any of these places were. Nonetheless, they overwhelmingly voted to approve a new student fee to purchase bottles of lotion, purified water, clean underwear and sanitary medical napkins, and send them somewhere helpful.



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In This Issue:

New Wildlife Show . . . More >

WikiLeaks Strikes The Western™ . . . More >

Five Minutes With . . . More >

Also in This Issue . . . More >

Wisconistan Crisis "Think-In"™ . . . More >

Pedagogical Enhancement . . . More >

Nonsense-Off . . . More >

Provost's Leadership Interview . . . More >


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Kicking Off the "Now, We'll Talk While You Listen" Tour



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